THE PERILS OF SCHOOL BULLYING!!               

By Dr. Sairah Qureshi,

 

 

PARENTS……… A new term is about to begin, it’s back to school for your kids!

 

Bullying is more than often a major issue that young people have to contend with and most often dread!  Essentially anti-bullying legislation states that each child has a right to walk, learn and play in a safe and harmonious environment…..but this is not always the case!!

 

SO WHAT IS BULLYING?

 

“A systematic abuse of power” (Rigby, 2002) with the keyword ‘systematic’ However, very often one-off incidents can be viewed as bullying!!

 

WHAT DOES BULLYING LOOK LIKE?

 

Traditional direct: Physical; verbal.

Indirect: Staring; rumor spreading; social isolation.

CYBERBULLYING!!!!  – All forms of abuse via the internet and cell phones!

 

WHY YOUR CHILD/TEEN MAY BE BULLIED?

Looking or being different; weight issues; the quiet type; looking physically weak & small; less athletic and more academic; ethnicity; homophobic issues; being diabetic & on insulin; disabilities.

 

KEY SIGNS TO LOOK FOR IN YOUR CHILD –if you suspect that they are a victim of bullying:

 

  • Mood swings unrelated to hormones;
  • Loss of appetite;
  • Loss of sleep;
  • Increasingly disengages with family affairs;
  • Fairly rapid weight loss or gain!!
  • Decline in school grades;
  • An increase in the need to be alone;
  • Being irritated or angry easily;
  • Signs of self-harm!!

 

How YOU can begin the school term & avoid your child from becoming a victim OR perpetrator of bullying!!

 

  • Ask your child casually about things that go on in school, focus on anything that is negative and challenge this;
  • Ask your child if they KNOW what bullying is?
  • Have they witnessed any incidents of bullying?
  • Ask your child if they feel nervous about returning to school…if yes…why?
  • Notice anything your child/teen may say about school or returning to school that is negative;
  • Take note of something they may say about other pupils;
  • Talk about social media behaviour!!

 

 PARENTS….CRUCIAL to your relationship with your child/ren is continual: 

Communication, Respect for All  & Trust = An open-solid relationship!!!

 

 

 

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

  • Casually bring up the topic of bullying whether over dinner or watching tv etc;
  • Ask/investigate what materials on anti-bullying are being delivered or available by the school;
  • ASK your child what is the school doing??
  • Speak to the school principle;
  • Call helplines for more information or help if your child is being bullied and the school is not efficient in their response!!

 

Useful Anti-Bullying Helplines:

  • National Runaway Safeline: 1-800-RUNAWAY (24/7, free & confidential)
  • pacer.org 1-952-838-9000 (8am-5pm Mon-Fri);
  • Garden State Equality’s Anti-Bullying Hotline: 1-877-NJ-BULLY;
  • National Parent Helpline: 1-855-427-2736 (1-855-427-2736 (1-855-4A PARENT)